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As the smoke drifted overhead, the conversation turned to the next day. The group needed to practice for the first stop on their upcoming tour, which would start a few days later in Japan. There was drama to discuss, too. The year-old guitar player, Steve Lacy, had been photographed smoking weed, and someone had texted the picture to his mother, who was not happy. In , a journalist interviewing the crew asked one member, Vyron Turner who goes by Left Brain , where he was from. Turner may have been reacting to the banality of the question, but his answer also illuminated a changing dynamic for rap, which has historically been categorized by regional sounds.

Odd Future was the epitome of this new statelessness: They were neither engineered by a label nor hometown heroes, but something wildly different. Odd Future dominated many conversations about pop culture and the future of music by the end of They had released all of their early work — a barrage of clever mixtapes, striking artwork and bizarro music videos — for free on Tumblr and YouTube. Their sound was prodigious. And not only was their music different but they also looked different too, a bunch of black weirdos who skated in their free time and moshed onstage.

The frenzy surrounding Odd Future reached its peak in Cartoon Network gave the group their own television show; plans for an Odd Future retail shop were in the works. Labels were desperate to sign deals with the group, and Sony Music Entertainment succeeded. The crew had the upper hand and persuaded the label to give them their own imprint, and to award each member a cushy solo record deal.

Bennett, the D. Music came naturally to Bennett. Though her parents are 9-to-5 people — Janel is a city clerk and her father, Howard, owns a manufacturing company based in China — her uncle, Mikey Bennett, is a producer in Jamaica. When she was 16, her parents let her transform their guesthouse into a studio, where she worked on her own songs and recorded local musicians.

In high school, she took music-technology classes and piano lessons; at night, she devoured beat-making tutorials and messed around with music software. Bennett gravitated toward artists who had pioneered brand-new sounds: The sonic spaciness of Missy Elliott, the stanky soul of Erykah Badu and the acid jazz of Jamiroquai. Pharrell Williams, the original black skater weirdo, is her patron saint.

And like most kids interested in music and living in Los Angeles in the mids, Bennett knew about a teenager named Tyler Okonma who called himself Tyler, the Creator. He had a sizable following on MySpace, where he released his music. She browsed through his page, listening to the songs he posted, too. She admired his ability to create deeply complex soundscapes, and she eventually messaged him, seeking advice on ways to advance her own style.

And when Okonma needed a place to record the early Odd Future mixtapes, Bennett offered up her home studio. In old footage of early Odd Future shows, Bennett plays songs from a laptop on a table at the back of the stage. Tomboyish, in a muscle tee and a short haircut, she crackles with the manic energy that Odd Future shows were famous for. She was generally indistinguishable from the boys in the group. From the beginning, Odd Future was meant to be a galaxy of loosely knit projects; the whole point was for the members to collaborate and spin off solo efforts.

After all, they liked the same sounds: jazz, old-school slow jams, neo-soul. So they began experimenting, and these experiments would eventually lead to the formation of the Internet. The band is artistically cocooned, trying to create, as she sees it, an entirely new style of R. Bennett thought this was a bit unfair given that, as the D. I looked up to him. He was a very artistic guy, and I saw past the few words that he chose to use, and I never really felt any kind of way about it. She made tearful calls to her mother from the road, wondering aloud whether she should quit.

Bennett also struggled with depression, worsened by the stress of touring and feeling disconnected from her family and her girlfriend at the time. She says that no one in the group — other than Martin — seemed to care. One morning while Odd Future was on tour, when the group was watching the sun crest over a beach in Australia, Bennett broke the news that she was leaving. She says it was not well received. It felt like a divorce, like a family — however dysfunctional — falling apart. She felt ostracized by the band for a while, but a few years after the fallout, any lingering resentment or hurt feelings appear to have faded.

Okonma compared the space Bennett occupies now to Lauryn Hill at her peak. Musicians like Wiz Khalifa and Jaden Smith have been photographed wearing skirts and dresses. But being openly gay can still feel especially difficult in the world of hip-hop and R. Lesbianism is often fetishized, made into a hypersexualized performance. While Young Thug can get away with wearing nail polish, female artists who give off an even slightly masculine air, like the rapper Dej Loaf, are hounded about their orientation. Minya Oh, the hip-hop journalist who goes by Miss Info, thinks Bennett has benefited from upheaval in the industry.

If anything, Bennett seems to have attracted an audience that appreciates the way her onstage presence transcends any particular gender. During the handful of times we met, I repeatedly tried to talk to Bennett about the importance of her visibility as a gay singer. And every time, she seemed uneasy with the idea that she was a symbol. The last time I saw her, we were having breakfast at the Hotel Hacienda Cocoyoc in Cocoyoc, Mexico, a few hours before the Internet was scheduled to play a local festival in a forest, and I picked at the topic again.

Did she see herself as symbolic of something larger than herself? You know? The cloud lifted. Now we saw each other clearly. The Internet — the network — has a way of normalizing fringe ideas, marginalized identities and emerging artists that old media tends to ignore. It has done such a good job, you could argue, that people like Bennett — black, queer and weird — can exist without the burden of having to represent something larger. Later that night, as thousands of Mexican teenagers rushed the stage, singing along in English and screaming her name, Bennett looked completely at home, and completely herself.

How does a song work? What does it actually do? In my favorite songs, this stance-causation is essentially moral-ethical — it makes me feel more able to go out and live. How does the song accomplish this?

Space Mogul

Was that the intention? This led me to assume the song had to be a result of weeks of arranging. But reportedly the band recorded it in one take, learning it from the songwriter Jeff Tweedy as the tape rolled. The song starts with a catchy eight-note guitar riff, to which it keeps returning, like a well-intentioned guy steering back to his mantra.

Via inventive instrumental fills and a false ending from which it rejuvenates with renewed purpose , it manages the strange task of seeming contemplative while escalating like crazy. What does the song mean? Well, a great song means beyond simple sense. It means by how it sounds. The trip cost him something but was so deep that he has to share it. The song is, yes, O. The effect of all of this on the listener — this listener anyway — is transformative. I feel a positive alteration in my body and mind: a renewed sense of humility at the sadness of the world, and a corresponding resolve to keep trying to be better; freshly reminded of the stakes of being alive, and of the fact that there are, at my disposal, more positive resources than I am currently employing.

At first, I thought my MP3 must have been corrupted. The effect is so jarring that it can easily be mistaken for an error, a glitch in the stream. When I learned that this tear into white noise was intentional, I was shocked. This went beyond breaking the rules. What matters here is the rupture.

A young man has been unexpectedly silenced. Out of that hardship, Staples emerged as a streetwise Everyman whose lyrics and musical production are uniformly lean and unsentimental. His compressed rhymes sparkle with aphoristic detail. There are no radio-friendly singles here. The preternaturally gifted rapper dresses in unflashy T-shirts and jeans.

And even when one can voice his or her mind freely, to be a successful black rapper is to perform your persona before a predominantly white audience, whose aggregate opinion determines your worth. Staples knows that possibilities for mainstream black visibility are few and fraught. Black entertainers in the celebrity spotlight mark one extreme, the grainy videoclips of African-Americans dying at the hands of the police, whose name-recognition is always posthumous, another.

How to speak against that? You can only unplug. Their looking was the only thing to see. White noise is a spray of pitches and volumes that contains all audible frequencies. It is constant and patternless. His signal fritzes into static with a snarl of hope: Noise and silence mark the edges of what can be considered music.

To end an album like this points to a world beyond the song and to hands manipulating the transmission. The next night, at Union Pool in Williamsburg, audience members who looked to have come straight from their jobs at Vice Media or Kickstarter exchanged similar glances — Case closed, my bearded, craft-beer-drinking friend — when she began to sing. The two deliveries of the line play up countervailing qualities of desperation and resolve in her voice. This instantly detectable tension in her voice causes listeners to become alert, even alarmed, the moment she starts singing.

Then she broke it when she fell off a piece of playground equipment in elementary school, and again a few years ago when, in a moment of drunken hilarity at a backyard party in East Nashville, a good friend accidentally smashed her in the face with a massive belt buckle weighted with bullets. Price endured a run of professional disappointment and personal sorrow after arriving in Nashville in With her husband, Jeremy Ivey, who plays bass in the Price Tags and writes songs with her, she tried her hand at rock and soul and made a brief, unhappy foray into writing commercial country music.

Serially turned away, ripped off and let down by operators in the music industry, she grew used to selling her meager possessions to pick up and start over, waitressing, hoping for some luck. Five years ago she gave birth to twin sons, one of whom died of a rare heart ailment two weeks later. He directed her to the Into the Circle dressing room, reserved for performers making their Opry debuts. Its walls are lined with quotes from country-music stars about how intimidated they were the first time they played the Valhalla of country music. Friends and family were temporarily shooed away as she put on something tight and fringed.

Foot traffic milled in and out of other dressing rooms along the hall, and from one came a furious burst of picking as a bluegrass band warmed up. Good to have somebody come out here and sing country again. Carlo Rotella is the director of American studies at Boston College.

L ate last spring, the country-music star Keith Urban sent a text message to Matt Chamberlain, one of the busiest and most respected drummers in music. Would Chamberlain be willing to fly out from Los Angeles to Nashville to give it a shot? The two worked together several years before, and Chamberlain was good friends with Dann Huff, a producer on the project, so he packed up his sticks and a newly acquired Elektron drum machine and headed east.

Chamberlain, 48, is a session player paid by the project, a below-the-radar rock star who often shows up only in the liner notes. In a world of dwindling recording budgets and increased automation, he could well be the last one drumming before software takes over completely. Chamberlain assembled a drum loop — a small-scale mechanical repetition born more of hip-hop than country — and then played live drums over the loop, deepening the timbre and also providing accents and fills when the movement of the verses seemed to require it.

Within a couple of hours, the drums-bass-and-voice opening and the entire vibe of the song were effectively complete. Country Airplay chart. This is the work of the modern session drummer, and it is why, when a major-label project needs drums, Chamberlain is often the first person producers call. And so he lives at an odd intersection, or perhaps a vanishing point; part virtuoso whose skills have never been more relevant, part John Henry figure, hammering away as music is increasingly composed and performed by machines.

In his younger days, with straggly hair down to his shoulders, Chamberlain very much looked the part of a touring musician with a soft spot for recreational drugs. Chamberlain in middle age still has a youthful bearing about him, like a lot of people who genuinely enjoy what they do, and he dresses low-key California: black Vans, dark jeans, beat-up button-down shirts. He rarely misses a chance to make a joke at his own expense, but there is a seriousness, an earnestness, that never quite disappears.

He drives a Volvo. He has a full recording studio set up: a control room stocked with vintage gear and a large soundproof tracking room where two drum kits sit miked and ready to go. There are drums everywhere, more than anybody should rightly own, stacked on top of each other and hanging from racks: multiple rock kits, a Brazilian pandeiro, Tibetan bells, a gallon oil can rigged with a spring that Chamberlain pounded with evident joy and a built-in cupboard with 20 slots for different snares, each of which is filled. These are the physical versions of the samples.

He cued up the track and then, without any practice, played along with it, sounding so much like the programming that it was almost hard to believe it could be a live performance. Within an hour or two, the track acquired shaker, tambourine and four flourish-filled runs on a full drum kit, just to give the production team some different options. Chamberlain is an elegant player; no movement is wasted. He plays with a traditional underhand grip, which is more often associated with jazz than rock.

By p. Then he went home to make pasta with his wife. Chamberlain was 15 when he decided to learn how to play the drums. As a kid in Los Angeles, he had access to some real talent. He found David Garibaldi, the drummer for the soul band Tower of Power, and began taking lessons. Afterward, he would hang around at the Professional Drum Shop on Vine Street, to pick up drum books and listen to older local drummers talking shop at the counter. North Texas State now the University of North Texas accepted him into its music program on a scholarship, but he lasted less than a year.

For a while he slept in his practice room with his head on the pillow in his kick drum. After he left school, Chamberlain moved to the Deep Ellum neighborhood of Dallas, about 40 miles away, where he played in several bands, often just for food or enough cash to put gas in his car. The band, without Chamberlain, has since reunited. After a year, though, Chamberlain decided to move to Seattle.

But demand for his services remains strong. In a poll to be published later this year, the readers of Modern Drummer have named him the best studio player in the business. On another perfect California day, Chamberlain was back in his Sound City studio, laying down beats for a company called the Loop Loft. The job was notable largely because it involved no musical collaborators at all.

The Loop Loft pays virtuosic drummers to create bulk rhythms that the company sells for a lump sum. The software is designed for people who are making records in their garages and basements or for commercial producers scoring an advertisement or the end of a television program. For Hakim, Gruss had typed out descriptions of beats and suggested tempos to go along with them, but there was no such list for Chamberlain. As an engineer got the kit sounding right in the control room, Chamberlain roamed over the drums and settled into a rhythm that Gruss liked.

Over the next four hours, Chamberlain would roll through nine other grooves and five different setups, swapping out drums and cymbals in search of new sounds and textures. When the Loop Loft session was over, Chamberlain wandered in and out of the control room, packing up his gear for another recording stint with Keith Urban. This time the sessions would include the Welsh bassist Pino Palladino, one of the most respected players around. Instead of adding drums to a previously recorded track, Chamberlain would be playing live with Palladino in the studio.

Chamberlain loves playing live above all else, for those moments when the music takes an inexplicable turn but somehow everybody stays together. No machine could match it. Musical duets are usually ordered by heterosexual difference and its various dramas. As in: She gives, he takes. He pleads, she refuses.

They may reconcile, but the performers always observe the classic sex distinction — making the circumstances of the female vocalist a good barometer for the circumstances of female speech in general. The women put on their respective versions of a placid attitude — Rihanna sings with cheek, SZA cheerlessly. Each is calm but, you suspect, coursing toward some possible furor. I listened to Leftover Crack and Bob Dylan. I waited. I sat on the floor and drew on my converse with sharpie.

I might have done nothing but rock back and forth, a time or two. We grew up, and we grew apart. And then, three days ago I ran into you downtown by the university. What were the chances in a city of millions of people? There you were. We stopped. We talked, and caught up. You said you were about to graduate with your degree in Philosophy. You always had loved wondering about the world. I hugged you, and I wanted to hold on longer but you started to let go, so I did the same.

You asked for my phone number and sent me pictures of your guitar. You said you wanted to hang out and play some folk tunes. I said I would like that. But you died today. I knew about the heroin, knew all the way back in high school. It was so foreign to me then. Death was foreign to me then. Where the fundamentals of your soul are still together, in one piece. We just liked it. We liked being alive together and noticing the things that were beautiful.

We just liked noticing things that made us happy. Thank you for always being one of them, for me. I plan on seeing you again, so wait for me til then. One love. My buddy and brother Jeremy Craig Phillips would have been 38 this month. See you on the other side. You will never be forgotten. You were right….

I hope they know that they are not fooling anybody. I read your note everyday. I understand…love you bro!!!! My first born son Shawn passed away April 8th He died from Heroin laced with Fentanyl. I miss him so much. He will be forever loved and missed. I never got to say goodbye to my baby.

Its been 1 year and 7 months since I lost the man who was loved by many and held my heart in his hands. He died of a heroin overdose and none of us knew this was his struggle. I put together what I could and I know he hid it well for at least 3 years. What was knew to his body was the antidepressants he had started taking 3 weeks prior. Sertraline toxicity combined with a benzo and heroin took him. Stigma and prohibition prevented him from reaching out but he was trying in his own way on his own to battle his hurts and overcome his medicine.

I wish he could have had another chance… one day… when the government wakes up to archaic nature of the war on drugs… and we chose love and health over fear and shame… people will live and not die alone leaving us to yearn and mourn the loss of their light. I love you handsome. I miss you. Since the day I got the call saying his dad found him alone in his apartment, I have never been the same. The news shattered me. I broke into a million pieces and I have no clue what its like to feel whole again.

An emptiness that nags at your soul. Your heart hurts when you least expect it. Driving past a billboard, or listening to lyrics from a song on the radio. Time never stops, even if you beg it too. That makes me sad, angry, but mostly scared. Because I know its permanently not with me. P to my awesome uncle matthew. My sweet son Jacob was only 21 years old when he lost his life due to an overdose, March 25, Jacob was so kind, so handsome, and just an amazing kid all around.. Everyone who knew Jacob is absolutely devastated.. I love you Jacob Nathan Dougherty. A hundred days have made me older Since the last time that I saw your pretty face.

I think about you, baby, And I dream about you all the time. I suffered along with him and felt his pain during his 15 year struggle. I tried so hard and gave so much just trying to keep him with us. It seemed we made it through to tough dangerous times, he was strong enough and made 6 months clean time, on his way to sobriety. Then his next relapse was fatal, tricked by the demon Fentanyl, Losing him in my presence as I fought to bring life back into him. God I am so broken by his lose, but you will suffer no more.

Miss you Buddy. For more than a week after you left us your spirit stayed with me and would not let me sleep. I felt you strong. And it was in your own cold tragedy I believe no doubt you saved a few lives after you by seeing a beautiful spirit gone in such a way.

In your own way you made them look. You made them face their own demons through you, you saved lives when you accidentally let go of your own. You forced everyone rather through shock, sadness, grief and or disbelief to straighten up and fly right. There is not a day that Darius does not miss you or talk about you. Rest well knowing you never have to wear a smile to hide the tears again. We love You Chan Chowder. We would of been celebrating my daughter 16 birthday on March 19, but sadly I lost her on December 30, to a Fentanyl overdose. My daughter and her father Justin Thomas shared the same birthday but sadly enough we lost her father Justin on February 8, to a heroin overdose.

Know you were loved by SO many. You had a good heart, sweet kind disposition. I will forever miss you, until we meet again…love mom. My best friend Matt passed away 5 years ago. I enabled him and he took me on the rides with him. We had lots of laughs, crys and everything in between. I miss him, I miss hearing him laugh. He had so much energy and life. I believe cocaine took his life. His heart just gave out. I will see you in heaven. God Bless…D. My brother-in-law, David Adam Massey, gone too soon!

I wish you peace forever. You deserved the sky! The universe! You deserve your wings! Misunderstandings can truly blind u from the truth. I am so happy to know your truth. Thank you for being as strong as long as you possibly could. My sister-in-law Kayla recently lost her brother Roy Edward Kirchner Who overdosed on heroin technically It was fentanyl. Among the more than 70, drug overdose deaths estimated in , the sharpest increase occurred among deaths related to fentanyl.

Drug overdose deaths involving heroin rose from 1, in to 15, What is wrong with this picture the only way you can get fentanyl is by prescription and look at the increase in deaths. Roy was 33 his son will never know who he is and his Mother and 2 Sisters will never forget. In memory of my friend Sean Hanagan. Sean and I were in the same sober house. He died at the age of 26 after a long battle against drugs.

Sean left behind a 5 year old son, Brody. Sean August 26, — March 30, My friend Joe died after long battle with substance abuse. At the time of his death Joe was a newlywed. Joseph Jennings March 11, December 29, R. My friend Sean and I were in the same sober house. He was one who would give the shirt off of his back to a family member or friend in need. I got to know Sean well. He helped me accept my problems and move on with my life.

Sean simply said that he wanted me to have them. It was if he knew he might not make it. Unbeknownst to me Sean relapsed. He died of an overdose. He had everything going for him. A 5 year old son who adored him, a wonderful family. A good job. At 26 his life was over. Sean Hanagan August 26, March 30, R. My friend Rob was a good guy. He had a positive attitude and got the most out of life.

He was very active in the program. Rob worked hard with his sponsor. He had some many plans for the future.

Four days before his death Rob did a commitment. By all appearance he was doing well. At 37 his life was over. Rob never realized how many people he helped out. On the night of March 14, my world suffered a tremendous tragedy. Not only my world but those who deeply adored you. Andrew stood out. His green eyes were always glowing. Andrew was so beautiful that the first time I saw him he caught my eye but I got scared and had to look away only to look back again.

The first night we talked on the phone I was laying on this park bench looking up at the stars. I remember feeling so childlike. At that time I had very little.

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My life was a little broken. I had you and that was all I needed. The more time without you, the more I miss you. If it could have changed your story. It could have but for how long? We all die but like this? I will never have all the answers. But what I do know is what happened to you should have never happened. You would have went on to do many more great things.

My memories of us are imprinted on my heart forever and I am forever changed. Thanks for coming up to me that night. This tribute is not only for Andrew but for the rest who have been robbed of their lives due to this disease. May your souls rest in peace. Please keep in memory my loving husband Robert Luna Estrada. Born March 8th and passed away on March 8th He was overdosed with Fentanyl. He died on his birthday and will be loved and missed by everyone. If the people he was with had known to watch over him or how to tell the signs…. I love you. I hope we see each other again in heaven.

Death is gods business. I feel guilty. You were everything to me. I was proud to be seen with. I always I was o er my head. Please forgive for enabling or not being a better example or more tolerant I love you David Little Rock. Jordan, God I miss you so. I like to think this is the case. Of course I talk to you everywhere!!! I regret you leaving so soon buddy, your life had just begun. I regret not being a better friend, maybe had I shown tough love things may have turned out differently, but then again we may not have been friends…Such a thin line between helping someone and enabling them exist.

And that line gets crossed and sadly was crossed. I wish you peace my friend, comfort for your family. Give Mom a hug for me and tell her I love her and miss her and tell her to do the same for you!!! I love you Jordan. Till next then, little more… Mick. Please, rest easy L.

Someone do something about this awful drug overdose epidemic. James Ryan Woods. They will forever remain in our hearts!


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He was loved by many. Caine was a good student, a junior Olympic athlete, a college educated man, an amazing soccer goal keeper, and he was so connected to his family and friends. Be gave a strong handshake and looked you in the eye. Caines life with heroin was short lived. His life is what made me the person I am.

I want to give tribute to my son for teaching me many lessons in life.

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Those lessons continue with a hole in my heart. I would like to commemorate Jerminda Cox who lost her 30 year struggle with addiction in the receiving room of a prison in August You may not be here with me but the memories i have with you will never go away …. Daniel Costello. Our beautiful 24 year old son ….. Loving,caring,compassionate, fun-loving, and so missed by his mother and father. We wait patiently for the day the Lord Jesus reunites us all again. We love you Danny. A year ago we found you on your bedroom floor. We were a family of four, now a ship wreck of three just clinging to the debris left behind and drifting.

Our son was a strong, capable, intelligent, hardworking, kind and compassionate man. He was prescribed pills after a surgery in high school and found out he could buy more at school. Fast forward six years and two stays in rehab, what would have been a simple relapse killed him due to fentanyl. He did not want to die. We would have done anything to keep him alive and help him get better.

He had everything to live for. In Memory of my son Anthony I miss you so much it hurts. Till we meet again my friend. Matt-we miss you every single day and will never fully recover losing you so suddenly and way too soon. You had so much life left to live and so much left to offer.

Your daughter has not been able to come to terms with losing you and is such a sad little girl who misses her daddy. You were my best friend. We love you Matty. Boy did you ever fight hard this past year with your struggles. You made Me so very proud. You always worried about disappointing me. And I constantly reassured you that you were my hero. Never a disappointment.

I pray in my heart that you believed that before you died. I was always your biggest cheerleader. And when you were approaching 5 months clean we were all so excited and proud. You once said that you were too smart to overdose. My worst nightmare came true when I got that dreaded call at work. I raced home trying to convince myself that they had saved you with Narcan.

And my pain is raw. You were like a son to me. I took care of you. I packed your lunch and left you little notes. I always told you to make good choices every single time you walked out the door. You will always hold a special place in my heart. We thought about selling the house because of the traumatic memories.

But now we want to stay because of all the living memories we have of you. I will always hear you running up and down the steps with your keys jingling on your belt loop. I know heaven gained a very handsome angel with a killer smile I know you are lighting up heaven with it, as you skateboard on the streets of gold.

Make good choices my sweet boy. Mike Forever My darling Christin Green who would be thirty years old this Sunday coming up died of a Fentanyl overdose 2 years ago March 7, I think of you everyday and miss you more……….. Rest in my peace my sweet first born child and keep watching down over your two beautiful daughters one which i am now raising.

In loving memory of my daughter Amber who died from an overdose on February 19th just 13 days after her 24th Birthday. You are forever missed and loved on this earth. I keep my faith in knowing that this is just temporary thing and I will see you again one day. In Loving memory of my Dear son Stevie Hardy.

He left this world on June 16, I Love and miss him so much. I placed flowers on your grave that cold day. I noticed the chime I had hung from the tree above your headstone chimed all the time I was there talking with you and all the while II walked to my car. I miss you as much as the day you left buddy. Does the sadness ever go away? I am thankful I knew you, for the time we had my friend.

Most of all I am thankful you no longer have to suffer my friend. In memory of my son, Louis Michael DeBacco 36 , a light in the darkness, who was taken home on Rest my son. Grief and sorrow make a person weak and strong at the same time. My only sibling died of an overdose in March It will be 15 years in It started so innocently 20 years before from a dislocated thumb. Please ALL be aware how easily it begins and can happen to anyone especially those with an addictive personality. It started with 3s and ended with everything that contained opiates including cough syrup.

My sibling first obtained it legally and in the end obtained it all illegally. These are our loved ones, love them always, love comes first over any imperfection we have. They are of worth of infinite worth. The overdose spray was not available then like it is now, please have it on hand. I know I will see PHB again only without this addiction. My sibling is now reunited with our father who died in , our mother and the dear grandmother who loved us both.

To my mom, I miss you so much and my heart is broken to pieces. I love you mommy, I always will and I will see you when my time comes. Rest in piece momma We were laughing and talking.. Nightmare begins.. Flight to maine.. See my baby, cold,just wake up please.. Back home to Florida… Life goes on… But I just keep waiting for your call..

Anything… Your sister took some of your ashes to Peru.. I know you loved to travel… Now your in heaven.. No pain.. No demands.

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Love u boo. In memory of my lovely son Ryan, forever Took ectasy at a rave for the first time the night before Mothers day , the next thing I know the police are knocking on my door at 6am Mothers day. After 4 long days in intensive care, Ryan sadly lost his life and to say the family he has left behind are devastated is an understatement. We miss him every single day and I will grieve for him for the rest of my life.

My soul sister Valerie. I love and miss you so much.

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You had such a hard life and then nine sober years. You went to college, you helped other people, you got knocked down and got up again until you could not. I hate the disease , I will always love you. My fiance, Mike, passed away this afternoon from a heroin overdose. He was an addict for 18 years but was getting clean again. He was my everything and I miss him so much!!! In honor of my first born child, my only daughter, Lauren Taylor.

Our hearts are broken and always will be. We miss you so much. We long to hear your giggle and see your happy smile. Taylor was a happy, smart, beautiful young woman that loved her brother and was blessed to have a large family that supported her thru out her young life. No one ever deserves to battle this horrible addiction.

No one deserves to die from this horrible disease. Addiction can take everything from a person, from the family and friends, and ultimately, in some cases, takes their life. She overdosed only once. I we will always wonder if we could of saved her. What could we have done differently. We pray for strength and pray for the many families going thru this type of loss of a loved one. My beautiful seester. Your 5 beautiful children and your beautiful little grand daughter……they will miss you forever. You were only My seester had 18 months clean.

She had a moment of weakness. That moment will never take away how proud I am of you. You were such a fighter. I am proud that I was able to fight along side with you. I will do everything I can to remind your babies of who you were. I will do everything I can to hug and kiss your dad and our mom as often as possible. I will push through this pain and fear and anger and lonliness so that I can be there for your beautiful grand baby. I love you seester.

More than words can explain. In memory of my beautiful daughter Caroline who passed away to a drugs overdose on 5th November , she was 31 years old and had been clean for a good 3 years up to her dad passing away Dec This seemed to be the catalyst for her demise. I feel absolutely devastated and so does her sister , we are still struggling to comprehend that we will never see her again or hear her chatty voice.

She was always such a chatty optimist and our lives without her will never be the same again. P Caroline I pray that you are with the angels now. I lost my son this Christmas morning. He was clean for 10 months, had good job, car , apartment. We dont know why he gave in to his addiction. We will always love him and miss him. Lost my brother Paul October 21st to a cocaine overdose Lost my brother James April 13th to a heroine overdose I think of you both every day.

This is for my daughter Lindsay. Lost you Thanksgiving day this year. My heart is broken. I know you fought this battle for several years. My baby girl your battle is now over and I pray that there is no more unhappiness for you. Read one of the last msgs in your phone saying how you hated dope.

Love you. In the poem Solomon and Saturn , "Mercurius the Giant" Mercurius se gygand is referred to as an inventor of letters. This may also be a reference to Odin, who is in Norse mythology the founder of the runic alphabets, and the gloss a continuation of the practice of equating Odin with Mercury found as early as Tacitus. The 7th-century Origo Gentis Langobardorum , and Paul the Deacon 's 8th-century Historia Langobardorum derived from it, recount a founding myth of the Langobards Lombards , a Germanic people who ruled a region of the Italian Peninsula.

According to this legend, a "small people" known as the Winnili were ruled by a woman named Gambara who had two sons, Ybor and Aio. The Vandals , ruled by Ambri and Assi , came to the Winnili with their army and demanded that they pay them tribute or prepare for war. Ybor, Aio, and their mother Gambara rejected their demands for tribute.

Ambri and Assi then asked the god Godan for victory over the Winnili, to which Godan responded in the longer version in the Origo : "Whom I shall first see when at sunrise, to them will I give the victory. Meanwhile, Ybor and Aio called upon Frea, Godan's wife. Frea counselled them that "at sunrise the Winnil[i] should come, and that their women, with their hair let down around the face in the likeness of a beard should also come with their husbands". At sunrise, Frea turned Godan's bed around to face east and woke him.

Godan saw the Winnili and their whiskered women and asked, "who are those Long-beards? Godan did so, "so that they should defend themselves according to his counsel and obtain the victory". Thenceforth the Winnili were known as the Langobards 'long-beards'.

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Writing in the mid-7th century, Jonas of Bobbio wrote that earlier that century the Irish missionary Columbanus disrupted an offering of beer to Odin vodano " whom others called Mercury " in Swabia. A 10th-century manuscript found in Merseburg , Germany, features a heathen invocation known as the Second Merseburg Incantation , which calls upon Odin and other gods and goddesses from the continental Germanic pantheon to assist in healing a horse:.

Phol ende uuodan uuoran zi holza. Phol and Woden travelled to the forest. Then was for Baldur 's foal its foot wrenched. Then encharmed it Sindgund and Sunna her sister, then encharmed it Frija and Volla her sister, then encharmed it Woden , as he the best could, As the bone-wrench, so for the blood wrench, and so the limb-wrench bone to bone, blood to blood, limb to limb, so be glued.

In the 11th century, chronicler Adam of Bremen recorded in a scholion of his Gesta Hammaburgensis Ecclesiae Pontificum that a statue of Thor, whom Adam describes as "mightiest", sat enthroned in the Temple at Uppsala located in Gamla Uppsala, Sweden flanked by Wodan Odin and " Fricco ".

Regarding Odin, Adam defines him as "frenzy" Wodan, id est furor and says that he "rules war and gives people strength against the enemy" and that the people of the temple depict him as wearing armour, "as our people depict Mars". In the 12th century, centuries after Norway was "officially" Christianised, Odin was still being invoked by the population, as evidenced by a stick bearing a runic message found among the Bryggen inscriptions in Bergen, Norway. On the stick, both Thor and Odin are called upon for help; Thor is asked to "receive" the reader, and Odin to "own" them.

Odin is mentioned or appears in most poems of the Poetic Edda , compiled in the 13th century from traditional source material reaching back to the pagan period. The meaning of these gifts has been a matter of scholarly disagreement and translations therefore vary. During this, the first war of the world, Odin flung his spear into the opposing forces of the Vanir.

While the name of the tree is not provided in the poem and other trees exist in Norse mythology, the tree is near universally accepted as the cosmic tree Yggdrasil , and if the tree is Yggdrasil , then the name Yggdrasil Old Norse 'Ygg's steed' directly relates to this story.

Odin is associated with hanging and gallows ; John Lindow comments that "the hanged 'ride' the gallows". On the mountain Sigurd sees a great light, "as if fire were burning, which blazed up to the sky". Sigurd approaches it, and there he sees a skjaldborg a tactical formation of shield wall with a banner flying overhead. Sigurd enters the skjaldborg , and sees a warrior lying there—asleep and fully armed.

Sigurd removes the helmet of the warrior, and sees the face of a woman. The woman's corslet is so tight that it seems to have grown into the woman's body. Sigurd uses his sword Gram to cut the corslet, starting from the neck of the corslet downwards, he continues cutting down her sleeves, and takes the corslet off her. The woman wakes, sits up, looks at Sigurd , and the two converse in two stanzas of verse. In the second stanza, the woman explains that Odin placed a sleeping spell on her which she could not break, and due to that spell she has been asleep a long time.

Sigurd asks for her name, and the woman gives Sigurd a horn of mead to help him retain her words in his memory. The woman recites a heathen prayer in two stanzas. Odin had promised one of these— Hjalmgunnar —victory in battle, yet she had "brought down" Hjalmgunnar in battle. Odin pricked her with a sleeping-thorn in consequence, told her that she would never again "fight victoriously in battle", and condemned her to marriage.

Odin is mentioned throughout the books of the Prose Edda , authored by Snorri Sturluson in the 13th century and drawing from earlier traditional material. In the Prose Edda book Gylfaginning chapter 38 , the enthroned figure of High Harr , tells Gangleri king Gylfi in disguise that two ravens named Huginn and Muninn sit on Odin's shoulders. The ravens tell Odin everything they see and hear. Odin sends Huginn and Muninn out at dawn, and the birds fly all over the world before returning at dinner-time. As a result, Odin is kept informed of many events. High adds that it is from this association that Odin is referred to as "raven-god".

In the same chapter, the enthroned figure of High explains that Odin gives all of the food on his table to his wolves Geri and Freki and that Odin requires no food, for wine is to him both meat and drink. Odin is mentioned several times in the sagas that make up Heimskringla. In the Ynglinga saga , the first section of Heimskringla , an euhemerised account of the origin of the gods is provided.

It was the custom there that twelve temple priests were ranked highest; they administered sacrifices and held judgements over men. Odin was a very successful warrior and travelled widely, conquering many lands. Odin was so successful that he never lost a battle. As a result, according to the saga, men came to believe that "it was granted to him" to win all battles. Before Odin sent his men to war or to perform tasks for him, he would place his hands upon their heads and give them a bjannak 'blessing', ultimately from Latin benedictio and the men would believe that they would also prevail.

The men placed all of their faith in Odin, and wherever they called his name they would receive assistance from doing so. Odin was often gone for great spans of time. While Odin was gone, his brothers governed his realm. His brothers began to divvy up Odin's inheritance, "but his wife Frigg they shared between them. However, afterwards, [Odin] returned and took possession of his wife again". According to the chapter, Odin "made war on the Vanir ". The Vanir defended their land and the battle turned to a stalemate, both sides having devastated one another's lands.

As part of a peace agreement, the two sides exchanged hostages. Gestumblindi said:. Heithrek said:. Local folklore and folk practice recognised Odin as late as the 19th century in Scandinavia. In a work published in the midth century, Benjamin Thorpe records that on Gotland , "many traditions and stories of Odin the Old still live in the mouths of the people". Local legend dictates that after it was opened, "there burst forth a wondrous fire, like a flash of lightning", and that a coffin full of flint and a lamp were excavated.

Thorpe additionally relates that legend has it that a priest who dwelt around Troienborg had once sowed some rye, and that when the rye sprang up, so came Odin riding from the hills each evening. Odin was so massive that he towered over the farm-yard buildings, spear in hand. Halting before the entry way, he kept all from entering or leaving all night, which occurred every night until the rye was cut.

Thorpe notes that numerous other traditions existed in Sweden at the time of his writing. Thorpe records that in Sweden, "when a noise, like that of carriages and horses, is heard by night, the people say: 'Odin is passing by'". References to or depictions of Odin appear on numerous objects. Migration Period 5th and 6th century CE gold bracteates types A, B, and C feature a depiction of a human figure above a horse, holding a spear and flanked by one or more often two birds.

The presence of the birds has led to the iconographic identification of the human figure as the god Odin, flanked by Huginn and Muninn. Like Snorri 's Prose Edda description of the ravens, a bird is sometimes depicted at the ear of the human, or at the ear of the horse. Bracteates have been found in Denmark, Sweden, Norway and, in smaller numbers, England and areas south of Denmark.

Vendel Period helmet plates from the 6th or 7th century found in a grave in Sweden depict a helmeted figure holding a spear and a shield while riding a horse, flanked by two birds. The plate has been interpreted as Odin accompanied by two birds; his ravens. Both stones feature a rider sitting atop an eight-legged horse, which some scholars view as Odin. The scene has been interpreted as a rider arriving at the world of the dead. The back of each bird features a mask-motif, and the feet of the birds are shaped like the heads of animals.

The feathers of the birds are also composed of animal-heads. Together, the animal-heads on the feathers form a mask on the back of the bird. The birds have powerful beaks and fan-shaped tails, indicating that they are ravens. The brooches were intended to be worn on each shoulder, after Germanic Iron Age fashion. Petersen notes that "raven-shaped ornaments worn as a pair, after the fashion of the day, one on each shoulder, makes one's thoughts turn towards Odin's ravens and the cult of Odin in the Germanic Iron Age.